Committed Intimate Relationships: Love Isn't Enough

Washington doesn't have common-law marriage. You could live with someone for 30 years, share a home, raise kids, and introduce each other as husband or wife—but when it comes to inheritance, Washington law doesn't see you as "married."

Instead, Washington recognizes something called a Committed Intimate Relationship (CIR). A CIR isn't automatic, and it's not nearly as simple as checking a box. It's a legal status that must be proven in court, often after one partner has died. The judge considers a list of factors: cohabitation, duration, purpose of the relationship, pooling of resources, and intent of the parties. Basically, it's like your entire relationship being graded by someone who never met you.

Now, imagine this:
You've been with your partner for decades. Everyone thinks of you as a married couple. You both know you're committed for life. Then one of you dies without a will. The surviving partner assumes the law will protect them. After all, "we were basically married." But the law doesn't know what you know.

Without a will, Washington's intestacy laws decide who inherits—and they're brutally rigid. That means your estate might skip right past your partner and land in the lap of a distant cousin you've never met. The partner who shared your life could end up with nothing unless they march into court, hire a lawyer, and convince a judge that your relationship qualifies as a CIR. Even then, it's no guarantee. If the judge isn't persuaded? Game over.

The takeaway:
If you're in a committed relationship and not legally married, don't leave it up to a court to decide. Make a plan. Write a will. Create a trust. Put it in writing. Because love may be enough for you—but it's not enough for the law.

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